Connected with Emily Beatrix
A purposely unedited podcast dedicated to having conversations that matter to help us feel connection to ourselves, to each other, and to the world we live in. Season 2, coming April 30th. 13 new episodes coming into your earbuds each week.
205: Transforming with Catherine Ezor
Catherine Ezor and I got close in friendship over the last year. I almost felt like she picked me out from the crowd on instagram and was like, “You! We shall be friends!”. And then, over time, we have become BFFs. We start off the show by discussing how we like how we moved into a healthy attachment in our friendship instead of going full steam ahead WE R MEANT TO BE FOREVER XO mode as soon as we met.
She recently helped me create the new version of THIS very site (emilybeatrix.com). She’s a photographer, holistic business/branding expert, and a transformational coach facilitating deep life changing stuff for women in her mentorship metamorphosis and various other rad offerings.
In this episode, we talk about what the actual steps of transformation are… 1) Acknowledging that a change needs to occur 2) Surrendering/ accepting/ grieving 3) Exploration and 4) Integration and all the nuances and details that these steps include. We reference my coming out process as an example.
We also jam about changing our names. Catherine was actually born with Alicia as her first name. We talk about taking on lineage or not, the power of ancestry, and our choices when it comes to our personal identity.
We talk about showing up on social and how to handle big transformations in front of an audience, especially if you’re a public figure or entrepreneur of any kind who values transparency.
We end on a sweet note where Catherine tells us that change is inevitable and it’s going to be really hard on us to keep resisting it - and she suggests ways to move toward it so your life can be easier.
It’s a helpful one folks. As always if you like the episode, please share it with a friend. And if you’re in transition/ transformation, and benefitted from this convo, tell Cat or I. We’d love to hear from you.
You can find Catherine at @thisaquarianlife
204: Fulfilling your destiny with Danielle Mercurio
This winter, Danielle and I shared a bed, and in the twilight of the evening, I asked her the big question… will you come back on the podcast?
Yep that’s right one of my very best friends Danielle Mercurio is BACK on the show as our first repeat guest with an in depth astrology lesson after her popular episode in season 1.
We are talking about north nodes/ south nodes/ astro mapping (where should you live), degrees in our chart, what Chiron does and means and we have a couple of good laughs along the way.
Tune into the episode this week on iTunes!
203: Sexual shame busting with Christie Federico
I met Christie at a retreat we both attended in La Jolla in March this year. We fell in friend love when we drove up the coast listening (and honestly belting) the hairspray and high school musical soundtrack with our friend Sarah when heading to dinner one night.
I was very interested in Christie’s work as a trained therapist and relationship and sex coach, so I invited her on the pod for us to learn from her. We ended up talking about some taboo topics and we shame busted things like how to handle integrating our sexuality in the world as women, stigma surrounding s.t.i/ s.t.ds, and even discussed the extensive ways why shame takes hold in our sexuality that can stem from getting caught masturbating as children and what we are told and observe about sex growing up (we both shared our stories).
This is one of my favorite conversations we’ve had so far on the podcast because the point of this entire project is to have unedited conversations that feel like you’re listening to me and my guest talking in my kitchen, and at one point, I literally forgot we were recording a podcast because of the raw honesty we were discussing together. We end the episode with Christie answering your questions to have better sex and intimacy - so this is definitely one you want to stick all the way to the end for.
If you enjoyed this one, Christie is hosting a free masterclass at the end of May that you can sign up for here -
If you liked this episode, and don’t want to miss the next one, make sure to subscribe to the show on iTunes.
202: Interviewing my girlfriend
In this week’s episode, I have a very special guest on the show - my girlfriend Mel. I met Mel back in January and we recently decided to create a partnership together.
We talk about gender, sexuality, the coming out process + what my aesthetic is. She says it’s 8 bottles of coconut water with a notebook beside my computer at the end of the day?!?
I strongly like our banter and how we talk with each other. Mel straight up barely does social media, uses her phone like 20 minutes a day, and she is a school teacher when she’s not surfing, so the fact that she agreed to do the podcast and talk about being and O.G lesbian WITH ME was a real win. We recorded this episode in a park, so there are times where the sound quality isn’t studio worthy and I so apologize for that. The conversation was too good to ignore though, so I decided we are rolling with it.
If you like the show, please subscribe on iTunes here!
Episode 1 of Season 2: Season premiere… I’m a lesbian now?!
I am starting off the new season of the podcast with a bang and letting you all know officially… that I’m gay. :-) I suppose that this is my official public coming out.
I discuss my fear around labelling myself as lesbian vs as queer and why queer feels best to me right now.
I talk about grieving what I thought was going to make me happy my whole life - a man in a suit with a good job and our white picket fence and the two kids. What is super intimate about this episode is how I share that accepting my sexuality also meant grieving once and for all the family I lost in my parent’s divorce that I was trying to recreate more than anything through relationships with men who had major issues but I was hoping would change for me - something I wish my dad would have done my whole life for us and for our family.
It’s a packed episode detailing my three biggest fears about coming out and how I’ve been navigating the process - including who I came out to first and why (and what they said and why I feel guilty.)
It’s very important to me to talk about my coming out process because as with all things, I think visibility and representation is so crucial when we are faced with things such as chronic illness, mental health issues and in this case… coming out as gay after being engaged to a man less than a year ago.
I wish I could just be like, “I don’t need to share anything about myself.” But I am literally the opposite. I don’t feel like myself if I am not writing about literally the TRUTH and the truth is what my life is.
I made a career out of talking about my anxiety disorders, when mostly everyone around me at the time told me this was a bad decision because it would limit me in my career. I don’t have any specific intentions about sharing my story on this, except that it’s a way for me to integrate this part of myself in my life and career, which is A BIG DEAL + maybe help a few people who feel like me too.
SO MUCH THAT YOU’LL LOVE. I mean, probably?! You tell me. Thanks for supporting the podcast by listening to it, telling your friends about it, and reviewing it on ITUNES if you get a chance.
Episode 13: Attachment styles and boundaries with therapist Silvy Khoucasian
Today on the show, for the season 1 finale, we have Los Angeles based associate therapist and relationship coach Silvy Khoucasian joining me. We talk about my favorite topic - attachment styles. We get into how we become either secure attached, anxious attached or avoidant fearful/ avoidant dissmissive attached.
We discuss the four different kind of boundaries - physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual, and we get into what they mean and how to tell them apart.
You'll love this episode if you loved my favorite book - Attached by Amir Levine.
You can find Silvy on her wesbite: www.silvykhoucasian.com
On instagram: https://www.instagram.com/silvykhoucasian/
And her legendary boundary program can be found her:
Episode 12: The resurgence of self through trauma recovery
Iman Gatti joins the podcast to talk about her own recovery from CPTSD and talks to us about hot topics such as forgiveness, boundaries, and writing our stories.
Episode 11: What benzo withdrawal was really like
In this episode, I read my #BellLetsTalk post, an essay where I open up about what it was like to withdraw from Ativan in 2017.
This is the first time I share the details of the experience as I approach 2 years sober.
To read the entry, you can find it at https://emilyaube.ca/emilysblog/withdrawal
Episode 10: Human design with Jaclyn Michelle
Connected is back in your ear buds from a short holiday hiatus. And oh boy, do I have a great episode for you.
In this episode, I'm joined with Jaclyn Michelle, human design reader and expert.
I first got a reading with Jaclyn in November of last year when I was making some big choices for myself (urm... to go back to California or not). She helped me see myself better than I had in a while. So I had to share my obsession with human design with you in the form of interviewing this former 1sr grade teacher turned powerhouse entrepreneur.
She explains to us what human design is and the purpose of it. We get into things such as: the 5 types, authorites, defined and undefined centers, and what the profiles and gates in our charts mean.
My favorite part, in the spirit of Connected, is how we all interact with each other based on how our charts jive or trigger each other.
You may want to take notes while listening to this conversation ‘cause it’s so dang good. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
P.s: if you want to do your chart, this is the website J recommends: https://www.mybodygraph.com
You can find Jaclyn at https://www.interiorcreature.com
Episode 9: Wild sensitive grieving with Lisa Nagel
In this episode, we talk about Lisa’s own journey with grief, all cumulating when she got divorced at 24 years old. We talk about grief as an invitation, what it invited Lisa to and what it could be inviting you to do. She teaches us about holy truths surrounding grief - that you want to hear if you’re going through a hard time so that things can make more sense. We also talk about what grief feels like. Lisa gives us tips on how to navigate fresh heartbreak and loss and she tells us about the storm season and how to honor that you’re in it. She talks to us about processed and unprocessed grief and guides us on how to softly meet ourselves, perhaps for the very first time, after our world falls apart.
Episode 8: Slowing down with Desiree Salis
Des is one of my best friends and has been a healing force in my life, especially in the past few months with her presence and FOOD. Lately, we’ve been having weekly family style dinners and we recorded this episode sitting in her devotional room after stuffing our faces, and chewing properly, the best brussels sprouts ever.
Desiree teaches me so much about sisterhood, alongside digestion and health in general. She let’s us know that our relationship to self and our relationship to our community can be simultaneously existing at all times through example as a kundalini yoga teacher and holistic nutritionist.
I really love this woman and her wealth of knowledge is uncanny. Because of this, she came on the pod to talk with me about what’s wrong with the world, kundalini yoga, nurturing female friendships, her past with disordered eating and how she has cultivated a positive long lasting loving relationship with food.
She also loves eye contact, so come to her classes and her life changing women’s circles if you’re in our area.
Episode 7: Period Power with Lena Dolter
Here’s the deal: a woman is not meant to be a man, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t powerful. In this episode, Lena Dolter is with us to teach us how to harness each phase of our cyclical nature as a woman, so that we can maximize our power and live in flow with ourselves, instead of trying to survive while working against our own natural innate rhythm.
We touch on things like how to insert a lena cup (or diva cup), why it’s normal to be horny AF when you’re ovulating, what Lena believes about contraception, and we have a really profound discussion about how the closer we get to our bodies, the more intimately we can have our identity be revealed to us.
If you’re obsessed with periods like I am, or you’re curious to know how to live in YOUR flow, listen to the episode and get your world rocked in the best way possible.
Episode 6: On being a sensitive badass with Amber Rochelle
In this episode, I’m joined by my Write to Heal client Amber Rochelle, who works with highly sensitive women to heal their relationship with themselves and their sensitivity so that they can discover how truly powerful they really are. She believes sensitivity is no accident and teaches us that being sensitive is an actual gene that affects our brain.
In this episode, learn how an highly sensitive person (HSP) presents, and gain tools on how to manage your sensitivity like how to take your emotional pulse.
Plus, hear what Amber thinks you should do if someone calls you ‘too sensitive’.
Links based on what we talked about that may be useful for you:
The book the highly sensitive person: https://www.amazon.com/Highly-Sensitive-Person-Thrive-Overwhelms/dp/0553062182/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1541802296&sr=8-1&keywords=the+highly+sensitive+person+by+elaine+aron
Episode 5: Finding the one and marrying him with Amanda Ranae
Amanda Ranae shares her journey to finding Matthew, her now husband, with us on the podcast. This love story includes profound reflections on noticing how someone is actually showing up versus how they have the potential to show up, and how Amanda learnt to believe people when they told her their capacities and truths. We talk about relational success musts and we share stories about knowing each other in real life - like when I didn’t know if Amanda liked me the first time I met her!
I can pretty much guarantee that you’ll find this episode nourishing, so don’t wait to press play.
Episode 4: Accepting being sick with Stephanie Kirylych
Stephanie Kirylych is on the podcast to have a candid conversation about what it’s like to have chronic illness with me. We talk about what pisses us off about how other people act around chronic illness and what we really need when we are sharing our experience of it. We also jam about what it’s like to try and connect with yourself when you are suffering. My favorite part however has got to be when Steph shares with us that when she accepted she was really sick, she began to live an authentic life instead of pretending she was fine all the time.
This one is for you if you’ve ever faced a chronic health issue, or love someone who does.
Steph’s instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stephaniekirylych/?hl=en
Episode 3: Being fit for service with Nick Clement
Nick Clement joins us to talk about dropping out of high school and succeeding in making his own path to purposeful work. Today, he manages and mentors a large team composed of franchisees in a big painting company in Canada - College Pro. He shares his insight with us on things like addiction and work-life balance, to remind us of the importance of taking care of ourselves, so that we can be fit for service. The juicy part? We talk about briefly dating each other in the winter of 2017-2018, and what kind of feedback we gave each other during that time that led to making a profound difference in each of our respective lives.
Link to study Nick mentioned about how much weight we lose in our sleep:
Episode 2: More than just your sun sign with Danielle Mercurio
In this episode, Danielle shares with us that astrology is her form of psychology, and I echo this sentiment by sharing that the things I am figuring out about myself in terms of my various psychological needs in therapy match my chart’s characteristics. She teaches us about the basics of our birth chart, what the houses mean and represent and what each planet signifies in western astrology. We get into the meaning behind a sun sign, a moon sign and a rising sign. I hope you enjoy this truly VALUABLE lesson in the cosmos, and book a reading with Danielle ASAP to get your world rocked.
Episode 1: Welcome to Connected with Emily Aube
In the first episode of this podcast series, I introduce myself to the world as your host. I share why and how my recent 3 year relationship came to an end, only five weeks after moving to another country to be with my beau and leaving everything behind in my hometown, and why it’s prompted me to care about making Connected with Emily Aube happen.